Fine Fishin' Flair

I gotta hand it to the tombstone guy on this one - this is some fine flair.

The boat has a motor, seats, and a steering wheel. Holy hell.

We have motion lines above the boat, a clearly defined background, and we can see the hook on the fish.

The dude even has a little collar on his shirt. Color me impressed.

Bring Money.

Mrs. Johnson, you've just completed your time here on earth, what are you gonna do?

"I'm goin' to Disneyland!"

Picky

I shall be dissatisfied with the real thing.

"nicknames"

I feel like I'm reading the menu at Chili's.

Sleep Tight

I find and posted a good one.

Insurance

Either these folks were afraid of grave robbers, or these folks' families were afraid of zombies.

The Friendly Skies

I'd rather be flying... than dying.

Also, I prefer smooth pilots to "smooth" pilots. Just saying.

Now in Technicolor

We don't want to take away from the magic of the last flag tomb wreck, but we've found a far superior flag.

That's right, 13 stripes, 50 stars, and in full color*. You're welcome.


*Also not shoved into the bible.

Holy Cow

Finally! Flair that makes sense!

Although, I guess it is possible that this person named "Farmer" worked in telemarketing, never farmed anything, and just collected cute little cow figurines. And ivy. And chunks of concrete.

We Have a Winner

I like to picture Jesus in a suit with a mic calling out with excessive enthusiasm, "B5....G46....I27..."

God Bless America

Yes, and on what page of the bible can I find the American flag?

Greek Life

At first glance, I thought to myself, "Yes! A sorority girl nicknamed 'B.J.' JACKPOT."

Then I did some research. This is actually a teacher's group, not a sorority, in which case I feel strongly that this woman is probably the coolest teacher ever.

The Muppet Show

Yes, and the capable hands of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew are a fine place to do so.

I Got Rhythm

God must have one kick-ass band goin' on up there.

What do you think they call themselves?
The Divines?

Happy Valentine's Day!

Punkin Returns

Here's to Punkin' #1 - you're not alone.

80's Legend

Do my eyes deceive me? Or are those the hearts from the super awesome 80's Nintendo game (with the gold cartridge) - The Legend of Zelda?

Let's take a closer look:

Yep. Definitely Zelda hearts. Someone should explain to the tombstone guy that you die when all the hearts are empty, not full.

English 101

Blessed are those who check their work. Or is it whom? Dammit.

Reeeeeeaaaallly Old

According to this tombstone, this lovely lady is still going strong at age 116.

Yeah, um, I think maybe she's buried elsewhere and just forgot she was listed on this one.

Drama Queen

Yes, I think most people would agree that dying is "a matter of great importance".

Tons of Fun

I wonder if his coffin was super-sized?

Taking the Fall

Global warming? All her fault.
The last cookie is gone? She totally took it.
Someone farted? It wasn't the dog. It was her.

Zombie Dog!

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Call 911

Jim* refused to park the fire truck on the train tracks.

That is, of course, until he was double dog dared.


*Name might be totally made up.

When Hippies Die

And weed.

Dollars and Sense

All others pay cash.

Looney Tombs

Damn you, Elmer Fudd!!!

Bust a Move

I think this bronco has been watching So You Think You Can Dance*.



*You can't.